Updates and Rants, 10-22-11

October has been as busy as September. We have had something planned every weekend since early September now and we are looking at not having a free weekend well into November. I have forgotten what it's like to wake up on a Saturday and not get showered and dressed until 1pm. Since September we've gone to Monterey, Daly City, Placerville, had people over, seen a couple of our best friends get married, had some great times. I'm not complaining, but it will be nice one of these days to just not go anywhere.

I took my ASL midterm last week and scored a 49 out of 50 points. I was seriously nervous, too! I thought for sure I had at most a C. I could have sworn my teacher looked confused half of the time, but my nerves were just playing tricks on me.

There are people in class that are just helluv rude. They talk out loud on purpose and giggle about it. Not only is it disrespectful to our Deaf teacher, but it's also distracting while we're trying to get instruction from him. One douche-ass stood in front of the class during an exercise where we were describing relationships and made something up about having a girlfriend. That's fine, but when he sat down he said so everyone could hear, "I'm actually single," just to get a laugh. They will all lose the last laugh when their grades come in. My friends and I are telling the teacher who and when the speaking is going on. Yup, I'm a snitch and I don't care.

It's one thing when people whisper to each other to help each other out, but it's another entirely to speak just because the professor can't hear. You would think that in the second level ASL class these students would have a little bit of respect for Deaf people and for the language, but no. I'm sure you've heard this rant before, but it's something that really bothers me. Anyway, that's all the rant I have for tonight.

Mom's up this weekend. We've been hanging out, going to the jazz festival downtown. We went to Davis Common to the Main stage at first. After awhile we realized there was another stage across the street. We went over and listened for awhile. We painted on their art wall in front of the Natsoulas Gallery and then went in and showed mom the staircase of art and the roof. She loved it.

Mom took Chris and I to Ali Baba's for dinner tonight and it was wonderful as ever. It's been a great day. Next weekend, Halloween party!! Weekend after that, Eid!! I'm making cake pops, chili and mulled cider. I was thinking about making a pumpkin pie, but I will probably just buy one, with all the cooking I'll already be doing. Here's to the holiday season!!!

I'm calm

Alright, alright. Another look at things after a full night's sleep and I am no longer freaking out about things. Chris and I got a lot done today. His mom is bringing her cutter tomorrow so we can assemble our awesome invitations that Chris designed (hint: make sure you marry a graphic designer, it's super helpful).

I didn't want to do the typical candy-almond in mesh with ribbon wedding favor that everyone throws away, so Chris's mom is doing bags that match the tartan and we're putting a chocolate in them with a wallet-size pic of Chris and I (one of the pics under "Engagement Photos" on Chris's facebook). We did three different poses so that people can compare which ones they got. It'll be like trading cards-hahah!

Only a few more thousand things to worry about until the wedding now! I'm so grateful it's down from a million. Time for dinner, peeps. Peace out.

4 months, 1 day, 23 hours and 15 minutes

That's the time left on my iPhone wedding countdown app at the time I started writing this blog entry.

Every so often, a feeling rises up from my stomach to my chest, almost like anxiousness or excitement (or all of that at once) and I think, "Oh my god. I'm getting married. I'm really getting married and it's just a few months away holyshitbreathebreathebreathe."

I was not the kind of girl that planned her wedding in her head from the time she was little. I suppose that's why I waited until 27 to get married instead of being married twice by this age like some of the people I went to high school with, who chased that dream down all the wrong places. I even said, "Why would anyone spend so much on a wedding dress? They'll only wear it once?" Yes! Yes, I'll only wear it once, but it's so gorgeous! I look like a princess and Chris is going to be amazed when he sees me walk down the aisle! It's the best dress in the world!

Chris and I don't really have a song. I've never seen the point of having a song with a person. There's a lot of love songs out there. If I made every song that made me think of Chris "our song" we would have 100 "our songs." Then, when I slip in a Dave Matthews Band CD one morning, I hear a song I have to ask Chris to dance to at our wedding. he said he'll think about it, but I literally got teary-eyed on the way to work listening to it. And so now I'm one of those girls.

Here's the lyrics:

I remember thinking

I'll go on forever only knowing

I'll see you again

But I know

The touch of you is so hard to remember

But like that touch I know no other

And for sure we have danced

In the risk of each other

Would like to dance

Around the world with me

I'll be falling all about my own thing

And I know your the heaviest weight

When your not here that's hung

Around my head

And your lips burn wild

Thrown from the face of a child

And in your eyes

The seeing of the greatest few

Do what you will, always

Walk where you like, your steps

Do as you please, I'll back you up

I remember thinking

Sometimes we walk

Sometimes we run away

No matter how fast we are running

Somehow we keep

Somehow we keep up with each other

I'll be falling all about my own thing

And I know your the heaviest weight

When your not here that's hung

Around my head

And your lips burn wild

Thrown from the face of a child

And in your eyes

The seeing of the greatest few

Do what you will, always

Walk where you like, your steps

Do as you please, I'll back you up.

So now I cry at sweet love songs and lose my breath looking at my dress. I romantically imagine our wedding day and my heart skips a beat when I think of spending the rest of my life with Chris. I have become cliché...And am loving every minute of it.

Wedding Things

I'm trying to keep my wedding simple. I really don't have the budget for anything grand. I'm not even having an official wedding party because I don't want to put a financial strain on my friends who also happen to be getting married (Seriously, we're one of three couples in my tightest circle of friends who got engaged in 2010). I've also spent nothing so far on a dress, but we'll see how that works out.

Chris's mom has a vintage, lace wedding dress that is so me I can hardly believe it. I know that I wouldn't look right in a silky, rumply, long-train stylish mod wedding dress that you find at all the bridal shops. Then again, I haven't tried any on.

The one time I tried to look at wedding dresses, I went to Renfro's on Main St in Placerville and they were snooty, snobby bitches whose first words to me and my friend as we were trying to look at their selection were, "Excuse me, what are you girls doing?" I said, "Looking for a wedding dress..." They asked, "Are you getting married?" Really? You really think I'm looking for a wedding dress to wear to the bar or something? They asked if I'd like to make an appointment to which I gave an emphatic, "No, thank you," and walked out the door. So that's the equivalent of my gown shopping so far.

I have only lost ten pounds and felt comfortable enough with that to let the cold weather and short days be a perfect excuse to stop exercising. Boo, right? But starting the ASL class has got me at least out of the house two days a week and I walk a lot at work to take the clients to the mall or the bowling alley or wherever we might go. I've also committed to eating fruit every day. If it doesn't mean less weight, it has at least made me feel better. So we'll see in the months to come if I can find the motivation and will to stand up and go (ugh) running. Maybe we'll have warm, longer days soon enough that I'll be able to go on the bike rides I enjoyed.

Since I began writing this blog post, I've set up time to play with makeup and hair with my big sister, Talia and to go to a bridal show with my Mom at Cal Expo next month. Talia also knows a tailor that is really good at letting out fabric. Her husband does some carpentry work for him and their kids play together, so I know I can trust him. I've also had a call from someone in my class who wants to meet a half hour before each class and on the weekends. My life is full and wonderful and I have more support than I could ever ask for.

Planning A Party

I've finally gotten the opportunity to host a party. It's a small one. I could only invite four people and they are crashing in my living room that night, but I figure if all goes well, I can eventually have more guests over. There are a ton of people who still haven't seen the new place and who I haven't seen in a long time that I'd love to have over. But this New Year's Eve is my trial party. It's like coming out.

Chris took care of the booze (I stay away from the stuff, I have a predisposition for getting shit faced and throwing my life down the drain when I drink) and I'm taking care of the food. I am using the new cookbook my sweet step-mom, Kathy, gave me and cooking up some meatballs with a hawaiian twist. I also have pesto and bruschetta courtesy of Chris's mom, Robin. In the morning, I plan to use my new waffle maker that my sis Sarah gave me to make waffles for everyone. That ought to soak up the alcohol left in their systems.

I feel so domestic! We did all our laundry this week. It cost over twenty dollars. I bought a real mop (I don't know what happened to the last one I had, so I've been using sponges and towels). I can actually get the floor that Pine-Sol clean smell! (Which Chris hated when I first poured it in the bucket because it was so strong, but appreciated it more after I mopped). I'm finally going through boxes in my closet to get rid of stuff I don't need or want. (Obviously, it's been in boxes for four months, what could I possibly be doing with it)?

The New Year is ahead of me, and I'm looking at it differently this time. I actually have an idea of what my life will be like, what to expect. I'm getting married in June and we've been looking into Disneyland for a honeymoon. I'm learning another language, ASL, and am going to try to recommit to practicing my rusty French a little bit more. I also plan on expanding my culinary experience. I've got about ten recipes I recycle all the time. It's time to break the cycle and learn some new tricks.

This last year brought a lot of changes for me. I left for Europe in August knowing that the next few months would completely alter my life. My big sister got married that summer, I moved to Davis and found a new job in Sacramento, Chris proposed to me, I even joined a softball team. I miss the people I left in Placerville terribly, but I know they're never too far. My life is full and rich and wonderful and I'm grateful for every day I wake up living it. I hope that everyone's new year brings the same joy that I've found. I'm excited about the new adventures I'm facing, while never forgetting "auld lang syne." Happy New Year everyone.

Guilty!!!

I always feel guilty after a few days of not exercising like I should. Actually, I always feel guilty after a few days of not doing anything I should. So much so that I actually feel like I don't want to do it. Call your relatives. Well hell, it's been months, I feel horrible. Might as well not call now; it could be awkward.

So tonight I took the bull by the horns. It's my second hour this week exercising and I really should be doing 5-7 days a week. The weather has been poor, the daylight hours are shorter after I get off work and my body isn't exactly hormonally balanced right now, if you know what I mean. I feel like a blob, so I've decided to do something about it.

I've taken up jogging on the treadmill. I do it for as long as I can (usually about two minutes) and then power walk until I catch my breath. I do this in intervals for 10-20 minutes and then I jump on the exercise bike. I like how the air conditioner isn't blasting in the apartment gym because then I get all drippy-sweaty and feel like I'm an athlete or something. I never got drippy-sweat at those other gyms. Something about it just makes me feel like I've accomplished something. The night air when I leave to go back to my apartment is enough to cool me down.

I forget how good it feels to get moving. I'll be sitting there on the couch, watching TV or playing on teh internetz and I think it must be better to just sit here rather than walk all that way in the cold to the pool and torture my body on work-out machines. I suppose this is normal, right?

I feel good tonight. Probably going to get to bed early. Oh! I saw the venue on Sunday, it's gong to be just the right size and everything so we're going to start paperwork soon. Now I can stop having those dreams about it being the date and having no where to get married. Onto the ones where I show up walk down the aisle realizing I'm naked...

Thanksgiving Updates and the Best New Game Ever (Not GT5)

The work week was only three days long, and so went by rather quickly, despite Wednesday being the hardest I'd ever had. Due to the nature of my job, I can't go into detail, but I can say I left work feeling completely inept and stressed. I ended up in traffic on the way home and running out of gas. It was brilliant.

I went to bed pretty early Wednesday and woke up only for Chris to ask me if he could go buy Gran Tourismo 5, which had just come out. One less 60+ dollar game I didn't have to buy him for Christmas, I said, "Sure, go ahead."

The next day, we drove to Placerville for dinner with Chris's folks. Chris and his dad, Garry, went to take the dog for a walk while I shared with Chris's mom, Robin, my relief at finding a venue where I could have the ceremony and the reception in one place so that no one would be mad at me for either not being able to go to the ceremony or having to leave some family members at the reception hall or whatever. Robin thought that was excellent. I think Chris and Garry liked it even more because it meant they don't have to clean up the yard anymore.

When Chris and Garry and Baxter (the toy poodle) got back from their walk Garry asked Robin about Gran Tourismo 5 and whether or not it had been on Chris's Christmas list. Oops. The ensuing comedy (or tragedy?) of Robin booting up her computer and searching her email for the Christmas list on which Chris insisted he had never put Gran Tourismo 5 resulted in Chris being promised a bag of coal under the tree this year. Chris swears he doesn't remember sending that email, the poor guy, but there it was from his address. After all was settled, we had wonderful snacks and a lovely dinner.

The next day we went to Tracy for my mom's Thanksgiving. It was splendid! The turkey was super moist. I don't know how my mom does it. I ate seconds for the sake of seconds, as I was no longer hungry, but what the hell-it's the holidays. I did exercise this week for at least a half hour at a time, so I'm not completely in the red.

Afterward, we played the traditional Apples to Apples game, of course, followed by a new game that requires nothing but pens, paper and an imagination. It's called "Toilet Paper Roll." The idea is that everyone writes a sentence on the top of a piece of paper and then folds the paper forward so that the sentence is facing up. The paper is then passed to the left. Players read the sentence and then draw a picture depicting it and fold the paper forward again so that the person they pass it to next can't see the original sentence, only the picture. That person then must right a sentence explaining what they see in the picture. At one point, seeing my picture of an army of bunnies saluting Hitler near the bottom of the paper, Chris said, "Oh god. I see where this came from my original sentence." The game is a blast.

Michelle, my little sister, brought her Holland Lop rabbit, Waffle with her. She said she just felt like taking him, but she knows I'm trying to wear Chris down into giving me a rabbit for Christmas, so I think it was also a good tool to get Chris to look at the bunny, pet the bunny, know the bunny and maybe want a bunny himself. We'll see. I'm still working on him.

The weekend has been pretty lazy. I'm enjoying my time off. Work is going to be hard to go back to on Monday, which is pretty much normal after these long holidays, but I'm ready. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Wedding Nightmares

I've just had a dream that Chris and I were dressed in wedding clothes on the wedding day and still couldn't find a venue.

I don't want a wedding anymore. I don't want to spend what little money we have on stupid wedding table cloths and stupid wedding chairs and stupid wedding cakes and stupid wedding places, stupid wedding food and ... damnit, I'm tired.

Thursday

Today was a pretty good Thursday. I had my own group and chose our own outing today at work. That was very exciting and I feel like I'm really progressing with a lot of the clients. I feel confident in my job and in my co-workers. I have all the support I need and when I need direction, everyone is nice to me and open to my asking questions. I also get appreciation for when I do something well or when I catch on to something quickly. In bigger departments I know how easy it is for some people's work to go unnoticed while another staff gets tons of credit for doing the same job. They just don't work like that at my new job and it's super refreshing.

I got home and promptly fell asleep. I have been finding myself staying up late this week just noodling around with wedding websites and things. I have had quite the adventure gathering addresses. I'm not nearly done, but I have begun putting the ones I have online. I started at weddingwire.com but the site all of a sudden stopped working right for me a couple nights ago. Weddingwire was great about getting back to me promptly when I emailed their support staff but I went over to theknot.com and started a back-up list, just in case. Tonight I went back to theknot and I suddenly had duplicates of a bunch of my guests. I gave up and went back to weddingwire, which had apparently fixed the problem, but then my internet connection stopped working for some reason. Frustrated, I told a friend I was switching back to pen and paper. We'll see...

Adventures in Venue Searching

This weekend Chris and I spent Friday and Saturday in Placerville. Friday night was the Halloween dance at the company I used to work for. Believe me, it was great to see familiar faces, no matter that it was still hard to say goodbye again. Chris and his band did some recording Friday night, which means that the new album is just about complete. We have been throwing around a few names, including but not limited to: "They're So Big" and other things Andrea and I heard them saying during practice that could be taken completely out of context.

Saturday was Venue Searching Day. We went to Mt. Aukum Winery, Lacham, Granite Springs and Fitzpatrick, which seems the most comfortable as a venue but has some weird rules regarding time and set up and will probably be the most expensive. We also took a look at Chris' parents' yard to see what it would take to get the garden at the top of the hill looking like a wedding venue. It doesn't look like it would take too much, so we're keeping that in the forefront of our minds. I just wish it was big enough for everyone to be there. As it stands, there is only room for the immediate family and honorable bridesmaids/groomsmen (we're not actually having bridal party/groomsmen, but there are a few people that we'd like to show our appreciation to for being great friends).

I carved a pumpkin this weekend for the first time in years and years. I was trying to make a picture of a Holland Lop, as that is the kind of bunny I'm trying to convince Chris to let me have, but the nose and cheeks ended up being harder than I thought. I eventually just turned the thing into a ghost. Chris carved the other side with a trippy-looking gypsy-eye thing so we put it on our front porch. Good times.

Chris ended up having a lot of homework Sunday night so I drove up to El Dorado Hills to go Trick or Treating with my nephews. We had a great time. Devin is taller than his mother now and very close to passing me up. Now, at 4"11' and 5"2' that's usually not saying much; most of the world is taller than us. But Devin is only ten. How fast those boys grow!

The Giants won the World Series tonight. We went out to dinner at Burgers & Brew downtown this evening and learned of the good news when some Giants fans ran by the outdoor seating area twirling their Giants shirts above their heads and wearing nothing but boxer shorts. That was interesting to say the least, but as Niner fans, we're glad that at least one SF team is doin' it right. Go Giants.

Hump Day

An eventful Wednesday, I must say. I'm officially a week and a half at my new job and I really, really like it. I feel comfortable there and am learning a lot. Starting a new job in the field I'm in has confirmed that I want to do this for the rest of my career life.

I got home and Chris and I enjoyed a dinner at Ali Baba's, the Kebab place downtown. It's very good food for very cheap. I enjoy the lamb sandwich because it is the closest thing to the Kebap we had in Germany that we've found in the States, so far.

After dinner, I decided to text my friend Mo, who bought a Go Phone to use because his iPhone broke. He hadn't saved his contacts to the SIM card, so when I text messaged him, he thought I was a mutual friend of ours. I just went with it. I recorded the thread and put it on facebook where it will live forever in its epicness. I finally told him hours later who I really was and we got a big kick out of it. Good times with good friends and the reminder that technology can always be used for great things.

Chris remembered that we had some more still pictures that weren't taken off the camcorder yet. They will be available in his photos and probably some in DeviantArt soon. He's been editing some of the ones from the Cannon, including a really cool one from the Eiffel Tower that he edited to make look like a miniature town. Check his gallery out here.

Wedding planning is coming along. I've started two online registries. I'm gathering addresses for the save-the-dates and, later, the invitations. I'm struggling with the budget. It just seems to keep going up as I research more. At this point, if my dress isn't free and I don't bake my own cake, we're going to be a bit in debt come next July. C'est la vie, n'est-ce pas? I waited years to hear him pop the question; be careful what you wish for!

Saturday we are looking at a venue in the foothills. I'm gathering as much info and ideas as possible. I've called Safeway for info about a cake. I've researched food. I've pretty much finalized my guest list (I'm sure I'll remember some more later, though). I spent an hour on the phone with my big sister this evening, which is always a good time. All in all, a pretty good day, I think. Time to get to bed so I'll be ready for work tomorrow.

Renting a Hall

I've nailed the wedding date and the ceremony venue (Chris's parent's house), and am now in the process of renting a hall for the reception. I began by emailing the address on the website and I wish I would have just called her in the first place. She now wants me to rent the hall for twenty-four hours instead of the four I requested, which will be another $125 rent. Alcohol at the reception would be an addition $225 to the $200 deposit. I emailed her back to let her know that I didn't want the hall for the whole day but haven't heard back yet.

Also in the email was fax number where I could send proof of insurance. I've never been married before and have never rented a hall so my first reaction was "WTF?" Turns out I have to have a general liability insurance policy of no less than a million dollars to rent this place for more than fifty people. My car is insured up to ten grand, I think and it costs me over $100 per month. I'm a little worried what one MILLION dollars is going to cost me, even if it's for a day. General consensus online is about $200. So my low estimate here is $600 for a hall.

I hope I hear back from her soon, because while I plan on having more than 50 guests, I don't plan on having alcohol, which I hope will keep the deposit and insurance low. We'll see. Worst case scenario, I'm paying a thousand dollars for a community hall, in which case I'll just pay the same price and go find one of the local vineyards and have the ceremony and reception outside in the same place.

Getting married sucks, by the way. I have wanted Chris to pop the question for four years and now I'm thinking that it better be the best freakin' party I've ever  had or I'm going to be one upset little bride.